Zen , You might as well tell us what YOU did to poor old Homer THIS TIME. You will be found out . You better Fess up now. It will be easier now.
#-o OK . . . just don't spit any of them nuts and bolts at me . . .
Well, it all started about 3 or 4 weeks ago. Homer started running a little rough. No problem. I know it's not the points cause I've got one of them thar fancy, newfangled electronic gizmos in it. You know, one of them things I've always said not to use. (What's the old saying? . . . Take my advice . . . I'm not using it?) Anyway, it's still firing and I'm running a Pertronix points replacement module, so I KNOW that's the problem. SOOOOOOOOO . . . I just ASSUME I need plugs (I haven't had these out since I put the engine together a year and half ago . . . don't know how many miles that's been. (Note to self . . . you really need to fix the odometer) . . . What was saying? Oh, yeah. I ASSUME I need a set of plugs, and I KNOW I need plug wires, and I THINK a new distributor cap and rotor button will help some. I probably need to adjust the valves too . . . I haven't adjusted them in the last, ummmm . . . 0 miles??? That can't be right, can it? Oh, yeah, note to self . . . you still haven't fixed that odometer . . . stop trying to use it to schedule your preventive maintenance. Anyway, I got a good idea of what's wrong, but I ain't got time to fix it right now. So I keep driving.
About a week later I still think I know what the problem is, and it's getting worse all the time. So, I drop by the parts store and pick up a set of plugs, wires, a cap and rotor. I still don't have time to install them, so they sit in the bus for another week or so . . . And I keep driving.
I didn't have time for an all weekend VW Adventure, so I skipped out on the Pensacola show and Circle Yer Wagens and went to the big Cruise-In at Lynchburg instead. That involved a trip over Monteagle, so I took the time the night before to install the plugs, wires, cap and button and adjust the valves and try to find and fix an oil leak that had recently gotten much worse. The old plugs looked about as good as the new ones, but the wires were in really bad shape (they had been oil soaked from the last engine . . . guess I should have sprung for new ones back the . . . ) and the contacts on the cap and button were coated with a thick green "fuzz" . . . so, between that and both valves on #3 being pretty tight, I figure I've got it all set. The valve cover gasket on the #3 and 4 side was not quite in place at the top, so I figure I've got my problems fixed. . . . At least until we took off the next morning on our trip.
It still wasn't running any better. Must be trash in the carb or something . . . I've gotta go. I'll fix it later. Somewhere up the interstate I notice there seems to be a light cloud of smoke following me. I stop and check and it's a little over a quart low. Guess I didn't fix my oil leak after all. There is oil everywhere . . . :-k the smoke must be from it blowing on the exhaust. So a quart of oil later, we're on the road again.
I remember crossing Monteagle last summer and not having to downshift to 3rd. A couple of times I almost had to go to second this time. :-k Must be carrying a lot more weight or something? Anyway, on to Lynchburg. We got there, parked, walked around the cruise-in, looked in a couple of shops, let the kids play on the playground . . . then decided since I was this close, I'd run on up to my brother's house in Murfreesboro. Had to stop and add another quart of oil along the way. OK, now it's starting to worry me that I "might" have a slight problem. Oh, well, I'll worry 'bout it later. On to Murfreesboro . . .
That evening on the way home it got to running so bad that I was starting to worry we wouldn't make it back home. But we did. The next day, I figured out the original problem. I have a vacuum port on the back side of the intake over on the #3 and 4 side. It is plugged off with a rubber cap. Well, actually, it isn't. It "was." Now, it's got about half of the remains of what once was a rubber plug that was plugging it off.
](*,) :idea1: :tard: 8-[ I'm not a rocket scientist or anything, but I can add 2 and 2. One of the 2s is a big hole in your intake will lean out your fuel mixture. The other 2 is a lean fuel mixture burns hot. The other 2 is that will cause your engine to run bad. The other 2 is if an air-cooled VW engine is running bad and running hot, especially on the #3/4 side, it's gonn'a do some damage if you keep going. The other 2 is that damage ain't gonn'a take too long to happen if you're on the interstate driving over a mountain. OK, now let me add up the 2s . . . 2 plus 2 plus 2 plus 2 plus 2 . . . plus 2 . . . I think that's all of them. Yeah. That equals . . . give me a second here . . . 2!.
See, they did learn us a thang or two in the Walker County School system!
OK, they weren't so good with foreign languages like English, but they did a decent job with math.
What? Six 2s don't equal 2? Yeah they do! TOO darn bad I didn't take the time to find and fix the problem to start with! I guess it's time to pull Homer's engine . . . again. And fix it right . . . again. It's like Momma always says, "Engines are like a box of Chocolates. If they get real hot, they melt down and it just makes a big ole mess."
